Today was a windy, rainy but pretty good day .
I didn’t run at all yesterday so that I could ‘recover ‘ from my 13 mile run the day before . My left calf was still pretty sore today - I think from the insoles I was wearing . They really felt good to wear for correcting my running form but I must have been landing my foot in a way that strained my calf muscle .
I also did tracks 4-7 in body pump 112. I’m trying to squeeze that in 3 times a week.
After showering and putting em down for her 3rd nap at 3- I listened to the ten percent happier podcast and the episode was about meditation .
I did a 15 minute vipanassa meditation and I’m trying to do that for 30 days to create a new habit of it ! It was really awesome . I sat down , legs crossed on out bedroom floor with my back against the wall . As you breathe in and out , you name the sensations that occur and then release them from your mind . Masons face vividly came to mind . He was smiling shyly , the way he often does . I noticed all the sensations of the real pain my body was experiencing as I thought of him . My thought tightened and burned - it took almost the rest of the 15 minutes before this uncomfortable sensation was gone . Tears filled my eyes and they also burned . I was sad of course but also happy that I could still vividly see his face in my mind .
Yesterday was a difficult day as well . I just miss him so terribly and I hate time and life moving on without him here . New year , new decade: exciting - but without mason in it , it just is bittersweet .
I made the kids corn and Mac and cheese for dinner . Jamey got us sushi . Em stayed up until 9:30! Maybe she’ll stay asleep longer tonight !!
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